Your six-year-old used to ask endless questions about everything. But lately, when you try to talk about bigger things—questions about meaning, purpose, or spirituality—they seem to shut down or change the subject. You wonder: Have they lost their sense of wonder? Are they not interested in these important topics? Should you be worried?
Here's what I want you to know, my wonderful friend. You're not alone in this experience, and more importantly, what you're seeing isn't what you might think it is. Your child hasn't lost their curiosity about life's big questions. They're actually in one of the most WONDERFUL phases of philosophical and spiritual development. They're just processing these enormous ideas in their own beautiful way, on their own timeline.
In this guide, we'll explore what research tells us about spiritual and philosophical development in children ages six to seven, why they might seem to dismiss big questions, and most importantly, how you can gently support their journey of meaning-making without pressure or force.
Understanding Your Child's Philosophical Journey
Let me share something that might change how you see this phase. Your child, at six or seven years old, is experiencing a remarkable cognitive transformation. Their brain is literally rewiring itself, moving from concrete thinking to the ability to understand abstract concepts. They're beginning to wonder about things they can't see or touch—things like love, fairness, purpose, and yes, even spirituality.
Dr. Eugene C. Roehlkepartain from Search Institute has spent years studying spiritual development in children. His research reveals something beautiful: spiritual development is a dynamic process. It's an inward journey of self-discovery combined with an outward journey into community and compassion. And your child? They're at the very beginning of this lifelong adventure.
What's Really Happening When They Seem Uninterested
When your child appears to dismiss big questions, several things might actually be happening beneath the surface:
- They're overwhelmed by the enormity of the questions. Questions about meaning and purpose are HUGE. Your child's developing brain might recognize that these questions don't have simple answers, and that can feel overwhelming.
- They're processing quietly in their own internal world. Not all children are verbal processors. Some children think deeply but share rarely, and that's perfectly normal and healthy.
- They're waiting for the right moment. Children are incredibly perceptive. They might be waiting for a time when they feel safe, when the moment feels right, to share what they're wondering about.
- They're gathering information first. Research shows that children at this age pull from EVERYWHERE to create their own frameworks of meaning. They gather ideas from their experiences, imagination, science, media, and different belief systems they encounter. They're like little philosophers, collecting puzzle pieces before they're ready to share how they think those pieces fit together.
What Research Tells Us About Children and Big Questions
The research on children's spiritual and philosophical development is both fascinating and reassuring. Let me share what experts have discovered.
According to the National Association for the Education of Young Children, meaning-making is a core developmental process throughout early childhood. It's not something we teach children to do—it's something they're DESIGNED to do. It's wired into their beautiful, growing brains.
When children ask a question, they often want to talk through what's going on, not just be told the grown-up answer.
— Dr. Eugene C. Roehlkepartain, Search Institute
This insight is SO important. Your child isn't looking for you to hand them the answers to life's big questions. They're inviting you into their thinking process. They want to explore these ideas WITH you, not receive a lecture FROM you.
Pediatric chaplain Amanda Borchik, who works with children facing profound questions about life and death, offers another crucial perspective. She emphasizes that children's experiences matter and can be honored without an adult having to explain them. Let that sink in for a moment. Your child doesn't need you to have all the answers. They need you to honor their questions, their wondering, their unique way of making sense of the world.
Children as Natural Philosophers
Research from Peter J. Hemming and Nicola Madge shows that children in middle childhood begin to internalize their own sense of themselves as distinct from others. They're learning to think for themselves and find their own voice. They're beginning to explore their identities—a process that will continue for years.
During this phase, children pull from multiple sources to create what researchers call frameworks of meaning. They gather ideas from:
- Their own direct experiences and observations
- Their rich imagination and creative thinking
- Scientific concepts they're learning
- Stories, media, and cultural narratives they encounter
- Different belief systems and spiritual traditions they're exposed to
- Conversations with trusted adults and peers
They're not passively receiving information. They're actively constructing their understanding of how the world works, what matters, and who they are within it all. This is beautiful, complex, important work.
Gentle Ways to Support Your Child's Spiritual Exploration
So what can you do to support your child's journey without pushing, pressuring, or forcing? Here are research-backed approaches that honor your child's developmental needs while creating space for wonder.
1. Let Your Child Lead
When your child does ask a question about meaning, purpose, or spirituality, resist the urge to immediately provide the answer. Instead, ask them what THEY think. Try questions like:
- Where do you imagine that is?
- What do you wonder about that?
- How do you think that works?
- What feels true to you?
This approach tells your child that their thoughts matter, that their ideas are valuable, that wondering itself is a gift. You're not leaving them without guidance—you're inviting them to develop their own thinking muscles.
2. Create Safe Spaces for Big Questions
This doesn't mean scheduling formal discussions or creating structured lessons about spirituality. It means being present. It means turning off distractions when your child starts to wonder aloud. It means responding with curiosity rather than certainty.
When you say, That's such an interesting question. Let's think about it together, you're teaching your child that exploration is more important than having the right answer. You're creating an environment where not knowing is okay, where wondering is welcomed, where questions are celebrated.
3. Honor Their Timeline
Some children are verbal processors who ask questions constantly. Others are internal processors who think deeply but share rarely. Both are PERFECT. Both are exactly how they're meant to be.
Your child will open up about big questions when they feel safe, when they feel ready, when the moment is right. Your job isn't to force that moment. Your job is to be ready when it arrives, to be present and curious and open.
4. Model Your Own Wonder
Share your own questions about meaning and purpose. Not in a way that burdens them with adult concerns, but in a way that shows them that wondering never stops. You might say:
- I was looking at the stars last night and wondering about how vast the universe is. Do you ever wonder about that?
- I saw something kind today that made me think about what makes people want to help each other. What do you think?
- I've been wondering what makes something beautiful. What do you think makes things beautiful?
This normalizes philosophical thinking as a beautiful part of being human. It shows your child that these questions don't have to be scary or serious—they can be adventures, doorways to discovery.
5. Use Stories as Gentle Containers for Exploration
Stories create a safe container for exploring big questions. They let children try on different ideas, different perspectives, different ways of understanding the world, all within the safety of imagination. Stories don't preach or lecture. They invite, they wonder, they explore alongside your child.
Stories That Celebrate Curiosity and Wonder
In The Book of Inara, we have beautiful stories specifically designed to honor children's natural curiosity and philosophical thinking. Let me share one that's perfect for this journey:
The Giggling Gallery of Forgotten Questions
Perfect for: Ages 6-7
What makes it special: This story directly celebrates the power of asking questions and intellectual curiosity. Lucas and Ella discover an archive where old photographs giggle when asked the right questions. Each question they ask unlocks more magical mysteries, leading them on a delightful treasure hunt through time. The story validates that questions themselves are valuable and lead to wonderful discoveries.
Key lesson: When Lucas and Ella discover that asking the right questions unlocks magical mysteries, children learn that curiosity and wonder are magical gifts that unlock understanding and connection in our world.
How to use it: After reading this story together, you might create your own question treasure hunt at home. Hide little notes around the house with wondering questions—not questions with right answers, but questions that invite imagination. Questions like: If you could ask the moon one question, what would it be? or What do you think makes something beautiful? This turns philosophical exploration into play, showing your child that big questions aren't scary—they're adventures.
The Long View: What This Phase Means for Your Child's Future
Here's something beautiful that research has shown. Children who are given space to explore big questions at their own pace develop stronger critical thinking skills. They develop deeper self-awareness. They develop more authentic spiritual identities over time.
When we rush them, when we pressure them to think a certain way, we actually interrupt this beautiful natural process. But when we create space, when we honor their questions and their silence equally, when we walk alongside them with curiosity rather than certainty, we give them an incredible gift.
The Magic Book reminds us that every child's path to understanding is different. Some children connect to spirituality through nature. Others through music. Others through relationships. Others through quiet contemplation. There's no single right way to explore meaning and purpose.
Your role isn't to direct this journey. Your role is to walk alongside your child. To be curious with them. To honor their questions and their silence equally. To create a home where wondering is welcomed, where not knowing is okay, where exploration is celebrated.
You're Doing Beautifully
If you're reading this, if you're wondering how to support your child's spiritual and philosophical development, you're already doing something SO important. You're paying attention. You're caring. You're seeking to understand rather than control.
Your child's seeming disinterest in big questions isn't a problem to fix. It's not a deficit to worry about. It's simply where they are right now in their unique journey of meaning-making. And that journey is unfolding exactly as it should.
Tonight, or tomorrow, or whenever the moment feels right, you might try this. Sit with your child under the stars, or by a window, or in a cozy corner. And simply wonder aloud. I wonder why the sky changes colors. I wonder what makes us feel happy. I wonder what dreams are made of.
You don't need answers. You just need presence. Curiosity. Openness. And watch what happens. Watch how your child's eyes light up. Watch how they start to share their own wonderings. Watch how this simple act of wondering together creates a bridge between your hearts.
Keep wondering together, my wonderful friend. Keep exploring together. Keep honoring your child's unique way of making meaning in this vast, mysterious, WONDERFUL universe.
With love and starlight,
Inara
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Show transcript
Hello, my wonderful friend! It's me, Inara, and I am so happy you're here today. You know, the Magic Book and I have been noticing something beautiful happening in homes all around the world. Parents like you are asking such thoughtful questions about their children's curiosity, their wonder, their big questions about life and meaning. And today, I want to talk about something that might surprise you.
What if I told you that when your child seems to dismiss big questions about meaning, purpose, and spirituality, they're not actually dismissing them at all? What if they're processing these enormous ideas in their own beautiful way, on their own timeline?
Let me share what the Magic Book has taught me about this remarkable phase of development.
Your child, at six or seven years old, is in one of the most WONDERFUL periods of cognitive growth. Their brain is literally rewiring itself, moving from concrete thinking to understanding abstract concepts. They're beginning to wonder about things they can't see or touch. Things like love, fairness, purpose, and yes, even spirituality.
Dr. Eugene Roehlkepartain from Search Institute explains it beautifully. He says that when children ask a question, they often want to talk through what's going on, not just be told the grown-up answer. Isn't that fascinating? Your child isn't looking for you to hand them the answers. They're inviting you into their thinking process.
The Magic Book whispers this truth. Spiritual development is a dynamic journey. It's an inward exploration of self-discovery combined with an outward journey into community and compassion. And your child? They're at the very beginning of this lifelong adventure.
Research shows that children at this age pull from EVERYWHERE to create their own frameworks of meaning. They gather ideas from their own experiences, from their imagination, from science, from media, from different belief systems they encounter. They're like little philosophers, collecting puzzle pieces and trying to see how they all fit together.
So when your child seems uninterested in big questions, what might actually be happening? They might be overwhelmed by how BIG these questions are. They might be processing quietly, in their own internal world. They might be waiting for the right moment, the right feeling of safety, to share what they're wondering about.
Here's something that changed everything for me. Pediatric chaplain Amanda Borchik works with children facing profound questions about life and death. And she says that children's experiences matter and can be honored without an adult having to explain them. Let that sink in for a moment. Your child doesn't need you to have all the answers. They need you to honor their questions, their wondering, their unique way of making sense of the world.
The National Association for the Education of Young Children confirms that meaning-making is a core developmental process throughout early childhood. It's not something we teach children to do. It's something they're DESIGNED to do. It's wired into their beautiful, growing brains.
So what can you do to support your child's spiritual and philosophical exploration? Let me share some gentle approaches that the Magic Book and research both recommend.
First, let your child lead. When they do ask a question, resist the urge to immediately provide the answer. Instead, ask them what THEY think. Say things like, Where do you imagine that is? or What do you wonder about that? This tells your child that their thoughts matter, that their ideas are valuable, that wondering itself is a gift.
Second, create safe spaces for big questions. This doesn't mean formal discussions or structured lessons. It means being present. It means turning off distractions when your child starts to wonder aloud. It means responding with curiosity rather than certainty. When you say, That's such an interesting question, let's think about it together, you're teaching your child that exploration is more important than having the right answer.
Third, honor their timeline. Some children are verbal processors who ask questions constantly. Others are internal processors who think deeply but share rarely. Both are PERFECT. Both are exactly how they're meant to be. Your child will open up about big questions when they feel safe, when they feel ready, when the moment is right.
Fourth, model your own wonder. Share your own questions about meaning and purpose. Not in a way that burdens them with adult concerns, but in a way that shows them that wondering never stops. You might say, I was looking at the stars last night and wondering about how vast the universe is. Do you ever wonder about that? This normalizes philosophical thinking as a beautiful part of being human.
And here's where stories become such a WONDERFUL tool. Stories create a safe container for exploring big questions. They let children try on different ideas, different perspectives, different ways of understanding the world, all within the safety of imagination.
We have a story in The Book of Inara called The Giggling Gallery of Forgotten Questions. In this story, Lucas and Ella discover an archive where old photographs giggle when asked the right questions. Each question they ask unlocks more magical mysteries, leading them on a delightful treasure hunt through time.
This story celebrates something so important. It shows children that questions themselves are valuable. That curiosity is a magical gift. That asking questions, wondering, exploring, these are the very things that unlock understanding and connection in our world.
After you read this story with your child, you might create your own question treasure hunt at home. Hide little notes around the house with wondering questions. Not questions with right answers, but questions that invite imagination. Questions like, If you could ask the moon one question, what would it be? or What do you think makes something beautiful?
This turns philosophical exploration into play. It shows your child that big questions aren't scary or serious. They're adventures. They're doorways to discovery.
The research is so clear on this. Children who are given space to explore big questions at their own pace develop stronger critical thinking skills. They develop deeper self-awareness. They develop more authentic spiritual identities over time. When we rush them, when we pressure them to think a certain way, we actually interrupt this beautiful natural process.
Your child's seeming disinterest in big questions? It's not a problem to fix. It's not a deficit to worry about. It's simply where they are right now in their unique journey of meaning-making. And that journey is unfolding exactly as it should.
The Magic Book reminds us that every child's path to understanding is different. Some children connect to spirituality through nature. Others through music. Others through relationships. Others through quiet contemplation. There's no single right way to explore meaning and purpose.
Your role isn't to direct this journey. Your role is to walk alongside your child. To be curious with them. To honor their questions and their silence equally. To create a home where wondering is welcomed, where not knowing is okay, where exploration is celebrated.
And here's the beautiful truth. When you do this, when you give your child this gift of space and safety and curiosity, you're not just supporting their spiritual development. You're deepening your connection with them. You're showing them that you see them, you trust them, you believe in their capacity to make sense of their world.
So tonight, or tomorrow, or whenever the moment feels right, you might try this. Sit with your child under the stars, or by a window, or in a cozy corner. And simply wonder aloud. I wonder why the sky changes colors. I wonder what makes us feel happy. I wonder what dreams are made of.
You don't need answers. You just need presence. Curiosity. Openness. And watch what happens. Watch how your child's eyes light up. Watch how they start to share their own wonderings. Watch how this simple act of wondering together creates a bridge between your hearts.
The Magic Book and I are always here for you, my wonderful friend. Supporting your child's spiritual and philosophical exploration is one of the most beautiful gifts you can give them. And you're doing it. Right now. By being here, by caring, by wondering how to nurture their curious spirit.
You're doing beautifully. Keep wondering together. Keep exploring together. Keep honoring your child's unique way of making meaning in this vast, mysterious, WONDERFUL universe.
With love and starlight, Inara.
